In case my lovely Citizens haven’t noticed, I am now updating my account on Twitter. In the upper right hand corner of the blog you’ll find my last two updates, but follow me during the week as I eat out someplace, go to an event, or have the burning desire to speak to my Citizens immediately.

New toy to geek out with! Yay!

The Czarina knows that some of her wonderful Citizens wander over here looking for food photography tips.

I know that I keep trying to improve my photography, and so I was happy to stumble on this tutorial series by Kodak – some basics for improving your already mad skillz.

I suppose I have to give it to Whole Foods’ slick marketing gurus – it’s a genius of an idea. Practically force someone to donate to the charity of the week by manipulating the controls of a psychological Playstation.

Whole Foods Market has a reusable bag refund. It’s like nothing. 10 cents per bag. Bring three bags, it’s still only 30 cents. But hey, you are getting some kind of reward for being green, no matter how small, right?

You’re checking out, and the cashier looks at you meaningfully, and says, “would you like to donate your reusable bag credit to X Children’s Hospital?

You’re now standing there, being looked at expectantly by people in line and by the cashier. And it’s only 30 cents. And it’s not even like you have to dig in that pocket for your 30 cents. You don’t technically HAVE that 30 cents – it’s a bonus.

You pause.

In that pause you already feel the people in line staring.

Irritated, but feeling pressured, you say, in a small, squeeky, and 100% insincere voice, “sure.”

You are irritated because you know that this children’s hospital is part of an extremely WELL FUNDED, MAGNET HOSPITAL SYSTEM THAT CONSTANTLY GETS IN TROUBLE FOR NOT PROVIDING ENOUGH CHARITY CARE AND PROVIDES PISS POOR CARE TO UNINSURED AND UNDERINSURED FOLKS.

*ahem*

Then you think, “well, I’m sure the extortion is temporary. I’m sure next time I come it’ll be a different charity, or this one will be over.”

And yet, go back two weeks later and you’re asked the same question, in exactly the same circumstances. People staring at you expectantly again, meaning no matter how you phrase it, people will hear your refusal in this way:

NO. I don’t want to help sick children. I don’t give a crap about sick children, and I WANT MY GOD—N THIRTY CENTS. I’M SO FUGGING CHEAP I WANT MY MEASLY THIRTY CENTS OVER HELPING SICK CHILDREN.

How much of an ogre do you look like if you do say no?

Hospital system, you don’t need my freaking 30 cents. You know it, and I know it.

Genius. And pure evil.

I’m impressed, in a really, really annoyed way.

P.S. Dear Citizens, if you are looking for a charity you can trust to spend your dollars wisely, check out Charity Navigator. They rate charities by how they spend your dollars.

You know how much the Czarina loves a sample sale, especially when there are FREE cocktails involved along with the discounts. Shecky’s is both an online and mobile event that partners with over 1200 designers across the US – and Shecky’s Girls’ Night Out is coming to Chicago!

SAMPLE cool cocktails, beauty treats, games, and more from Shecky’s partners.

SCORE up to $100 in beauty products and fun freebies in Shecky’s Famous Goodie Bag.

SHOP hundreds of hot, one-of-a-kind items from indie designers and boutiques across the U.S.—all at up to 75 percent off!

Aside from their events, Shecky’s synthesizes the hot trends and lets you know where to find them, with links to the online retailers. I really enjoy this feature, as who has time to comb through all online sites to find the best options? For instance, their feature on lace tights included the best of the best and what to wear them with. It reminds me a bit of The Lucky Shopping Manual that I have previously recommended, only the writing style is more friendly and the links make it easier to find what you want.

Sign up to be a Shecky’s Insider on the website to get emails and watch Stylefool for a sponsored giveaway!

Shecky’s Girls Night Out Chicago

Date: Wed.-Fri., Mar. 18th-20th, 2009
Time: 5pm-10pm
Place: The Great Hall at Chicago Union Station
210 S. Canal St. (entrance on Jackson Blvd.)
Price: $25 in advance, and $15 if purchased before February 25th!