Oh, boy, was I excited about Neiman Marcus Online for a while.

I’ve ordered from them reliably since 2003. In the past couple of years, though, the service has taken a distinct nosedive and since ThongGate I’m going out of my way to avoid them in the future.

Follow up:

First, there is a distinction between NM brick and mortar and NM Online. The two are not linked in any meaningful way. This means that you can order something from NM Online that isn’t stocked in stores, and an item can be on sale online that isn’t on sale in the stores. They have SmartLabels, so all you need to do is to tape that label back on the box, take the box to the post office, and send it off. This shipping is not free, so keep in mind that they charge your card about $9.50 or so. One very good thing remains, though: you can return something you order online to a store if there is one near you. I highly recommend you bring your item to a brick and mortar NM if you want to return something you bought online, because otherwise it takes at least three weeks for you to get your credit.

Second, while they advertise FREE SHIPPING WITH CODE ‘X’ (it changes), the shipping is kind of scary. Historically, this wasn’t the case. They used 2-day Fed Ex (which you now have to pay an upgrade for) and signatures were required. Now, Fed Ex Ground just chucks it onto your doorstep and leaves it, no sig required.

I don’t know about you, but when I order from NM I would prefer I actually get the item. Since I live in the city, I am not excited about ordering an expensive purse (on sale of course) and then find it left on my porch, in full view of the street. The last time this happened, I was not home and it started raining on my brand new purse (it had been raining all day), and the box was not in a plastic bag.

Third, customer service at NM in all its incarnations is going downhill fast. The lovely ladies at The Purse Forum and The Fashion Spot have made it clear that they have noticed the same thing. I returned an item and didn’t get credit for it until I combed through my entire web history. I used the IM tool to contact a sales associate who proceeded to argue with me that I had NOT returned that item, I had actually returned a pair of Hanky Panky red thong underwear. He would not listen that perhaps my return was misrecorded.

Basically, to get him to shut up about it being MY mistake, I had to tell him I wore the underwear yesterday, and I had not returned it. I had visions of being “hung up” on because I was some kind of pervert. But I felt like he was accusing me of stealing, and I was annoyed. Several days later, their mistake was corrected, but I did not receive a phone call letting me know it was fixed. I had to research it myself.

The Czarina’s verdict: Too hard. Not worth it, unless you are going to die without the item. If this is really the only way you can get the goods that you want, make sure you stay on top of where your items are, and have them delivered to work where lawn gnomes have less of a chance of carrying them off.